Keep Your Intelligence Healthy

                          I believe in love, big time, and I’m happy to report I receive oodles of it from those around me. I trust and respect everyone in my inner circle and if I don’t, then I have no room fort hem in my “jar.” Let me explain. The ham-jar metaphor is a helpful way to focus on the love and positives in your life. Just like a jam jar has only a limited amount of space to fill, so does your life and you should only fill it with people and things that have earnt the right to be there.

                          While there are things in my jar that I love, but may not always like – such is life – I make sure nothing negative is allowed to stay; not because I’m selfish or unkind, but because it will affect every part of my life, including those I love. İt’s getting close to Valentine’s Day and we’re going to be bombarded with social media posts about eternal love and flowers being sent and balloons and all that jazz. But there will be little about loving yourself, so I advise you to turn your thoughts inward and take a look at what you genuinely love in your life and what you should really throw out your jar.

                          İf you don’t tend to your jar, no one will – not even the most generous of lovers. İt’s an inside job and you have to love yourself, atherwise you’re not going to love your life as you should. Self-love makes it much easier to deal with the negative elements around you.

                          Over the past few months, I’ve come to understand love in a way I’m not sure I really did before. İn losing him, I have felt a loss that is indescribably painful, but in it I feel love and that has changed me. Now, I won’t waste a day in anger or regret. I’ll pick up the phone if I need to apologies, restoring my self-love by doing the right thing.

                          I also notice the bits about my day that I don’t love, and change and tweak what I can. Love makes me edit my life ruthlessly and the more I do this, the more I appreciate each day. İt’s not all roses and gratitude journals – God pity you if I’m having a hormonal day – but I soon notice if I’m filling my jar with anger or regret or self-sabotage.

                          İt goes against everything bit of live in my body, but what I’m saying is that you have to love yourself first. Give yourself permission to put yourself and your needs at the centre of your life. Because valuing your time, your routines and the life you have created is the uldimate love letter.
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